"so somedays you just need ice cream. and some days crazy laughter and long sunlight and you need to really just get outside and feel life and breathe...and then there are days when change is painfully hard." -Ann Voskamp
That may be the road you're on right now. It's a hard one. Some days the light shines so warm and bright. Other days, you're not sure know which way to turn. Joy doesn't always come in the morning, but God's grace is constantly being breathed upon you and I.
You see, we are significantly blessed by an all-powerful God. And on painfully hard days when you just want crazy laughter, fresh air, and to not feel so alone; a pen and paper are the best medicine. Because writing-it frees something within our souls. It express the words within ourselves and gives us the ability to be known.
On these days, I like to pull out my favorite journal and write letters to the man I hope to one day call my husband...
Dear Future Husband,
I can't wait to do life with you. To pray before bed alongside of you. To wake with the light and snuggle close in the stillness of the morning. To enjoy His grace together. I love you and pray these things for you daily...
- ...that you will love my siblings as if they were your siblings. My brother is my best friend and he will walk me down the aisle the day you and I become one. If you want me, you will get him too. Learn to love all things outdoors and to laugh at all of his dorkiness. It's the cutest. Oh, and I call him Smalls. My sister and I may fight like siblings, but she is one of the sweetest people I know. Gift giving is her love language, and I don't mind it at all. ;)
- ...that you love the Lord. Every relationship should be centered around Christ. I pray that right now, you are being shaped and molded into a man of integrity and good work ethic. I hope that by the time we meet, you are already madly in love with the same all consuming Jesus that I love. I pray that you have a deep passion to know Him more, to serve Him daily, and to be His hands and feet.
- ...that you are ready to take on my hurt. I've been hurt, a little broken, and a little bruised before we have even ever met. I am sorry for my past and pray you are careful with my future. There are hard days that come with that, but I am learning to mend daily.
- ...that you love spending time with family. I love my family and love being with them. And, no matter how crazy, down to earth, or outrageous yours may be, I love them already. I cannot wait for new family traditions with you and your family.
- ...that you want a big family. I want eleven kids. Okay, ELEVEN. I am laying it all out there...so be ready for snuggles, laughter, many tooth fairy visits, lots of tears, proms/dances, first dates, ballgames, scraped knees and so many more of the things we experienced as children. I pray that we let them learn from their mistakes but also share ours. That we lead them by example and raise them to walk in the light as our parents raised us. I pray we give them grace daily and end each day with more love for one another than the day before.
- ...that you want to adopt. What? Did you think I was going to give birth to all eleven of those kids? Funny. I pray your heart is in the same place and that our family is a complete picture of the gospel. I dream of having a family of many races/ethnicities. I want nothing more than to see the fatherless come home to their forever families, and I pray that for a few we can give them just that.
- ...that you like to give flowers and kiss foreheads No flowers don't last more than a week, but they do show that you are thinking of me. And no matter how old I get, fresh flowers and a kiss on the forehead will always be two of my favorite things. You can never go wrong with a few beautiful stems in a little mason jar and a little kiss.
- ...that you will date me always. No matter how many children we have or how old we get, I will never want to stop dating you. Dinner, picnics, long walks, or long conversations; it doesn't have to be fancy. It just has to be intentional.
- ...that you will never give up on your passions and dreams. I am already your biggest fan. No matter the path the Lord leads you on, I will be there cheering you on. I will be there encouraging you the whole way. I pray you don't lose sight of the one who created you to have such big dreams, and that you invite me into the deepest part of your life where those dreams dwell.
- ...that you don't mind listening to me sing. Here's the thing, I love to sing. Whether I am sick and sound like a dying cow, or whether I am having a pretty solid vocal day. I will belt out the song if I know it. I will sing in the shower. I will sing while cleaning. I will rock out in the car. Music is my release and and I pray that you understand that and that you will jump in and worship right along side of me on days when I am down on my knees and just need a Savior and a friend.
- ...that you trust grace will always meet you. When God made you, He breathed grace into your life. So, don't be afraid to love big, laugh loud, believe in beauty and simplicity. Don't be afraid to love a world in need and give back grace that is given unto you and I.
- ...that you have a love for simplicity. I sometimes think I was born in the wrong era. I love all things old fashioned, handmade, and southern. Long walks, long talks, sweet tea, mason jars, front porch swings, gardens, and farmhouse life. I love to dream of a simpler time. I pray you embrace the love I have for these things, and enjoy the little things too.
I could go on forever. There are so many things I pray for you. I cannot promise you that we will always have a happily ever after. But, I can promise to love you with everything inside of me. I can promise to always be there when we have to live life hard. I can promise to always seek God alongside of you as we learn to love one another as Christ has loved us. I can promise to always write you love letters, and to remind you how much you are already loved, prayed for, and dreamed of. I can promise to do life big with you, to give much grace as I receive much grace. And, when joy comes in the morning, I will rejoice alongside of you in the light that shines bright upon us, breathes grace into us, and is there on the days when change is painfully hard.
Until the day we meet, I am praying for you and the man you will be.
All my love,
Your Future Bride.